Herman’s Story

In this podcast episode, Herman undergoes what he describes as a midlife crisis and feels unfulfilled, despite his successful career. Herman describes himself as a skeptic focused on numbers. He decides to try psychedelics as a way to reset his life. Having no prior experience with psychedelics, he decided to attend Eleusinia retreat. His experiences at Eleusinia had a life-changing effect. During his experience, he was able to release bottled-up emotions of grief and joy. He connects with a spiritual presence that acts as a teacher about the universe, love, and interconnectedness. Listen here, on Spotify, or on Apple Podcast,

Tawnya: Herman, thank you so much for coming to the show. It’s such an honor to have you here. Can you tell us a little bit about who you are and why you decided to come to Eleusinia? 

Herman: Oh, thank you so much, Tawnya for inviting me. Yeah, so I am a middle-aged person who is going through his life and I work in the finance sector.

I have been working there for close to 15, 20 years. Yeah so, the reason why I decided to come was because pre COVID I had, going through a live career change and that kind of threw me into a cycle where I did not have a good direction with my life in terms of professionally, I’m, I was, I was very successful in finance, but I just did not see myself in that particular role going forward and turning 60 and having a bald head and nothing else behind me.

 So yeah. We recently moved into the suburbs and things got a little bit more you know, and better in a sense. I thought something was off with my life and having gone through the COVID sitting at home for more than three years and not having anything tangible, I guess to do, actually took a toll on me psychologically.

And I wanted to have a reset And in that, that was basically the basic motivation for me to come. and spend some time in your retreat. 

Tawnya: Did you have any previous experience with psychedelics? 

Herman: No, absolutely not. Maybe I’ve smoked a joint or two, a couple of times in my life. But I was never interested in these things at all. Strangely enough, I started Googling things like, what do I do with my life, kind of thing. I was in, in a, you could call me a, a person who is in midlife crisis, and I was never into big shiny cars.

And when I offered that I would buy something like that to my wife, she said, you’re crazy. like, don’t want those cars and whatnot. Anyway, I decided I’m not gonna buy those. But then I wanted to do something to change my life and the mushrooms and psychedelics just popped up, and sounded interesting, you know, I started going into the rabbit hole about how these things work because I wanted to make sure that whatever I do, it doesn’t turn me into an addict. I, that’s the last thing I want to see, my kids see me as an addict or somebody who cannot control himself.

And, slowly came to realize that the mushrooms, the way they work, they come into your system, they stimulate your nerves. They actually form you neural connections and the end result is that you kind of, physically rewire your brain and then they leave, there are no natural side effects or anything like that, apart from a very minor sort of queasiness that you might get during the session.

So, yeah, that’s, that basically, kind of started getting me thinking about it and I started going down the rabbit hole again deeper listening to the interviews, listening to the experiences people had, and I started getting to realize that that’s exactly what I want. One of the recordings I think I heard from some other retreat and I’d done a lot of shopping around, by the way before that, was that some guy, some person said that he had a thousand years of therapy in one hour or, or five hours. And that kind of clicked in my head. I said to myself, I need to try this. Basically, that’s why I did what I did.

Tawnya: How did your wife feel about it? How was she feeling about you going to a psychedelic retreat? 

Herman: I mean, we talked about this for a long time and I couldn’t explain what was wrong with my life, ’cause I mean, we are in a good place. But there was something off.

I just could not place it, back in the day when I left finance for a while. I knew what was wrong because, I thought to myself that, I don’t wanna spend the good years of my life doing whatever I was doing because it was just not fulfilling. Here I had a role that I, like, I had, I’m in an industry I like still in finance, but in a very new environment and a, and a new side of finance that’s very cutting edge.

I would, I’m happy professionally, but also at the same time I thought there was something wrong and I think it had to do with all these pent-up sort of idiosyncrasies that, that took place before and right, right in the middle of COVID, all these things that, that happened. I was unemployed during the COVID and it took a toll on me psychologically also.

And that basically threw me off a little bit. Eventually, I built the company, I sold it, and everything turned out well. But the stress of going through life, knowing that you’re not making enough money to feed your family was really, really big. And I needed, I needed to, to get that off my shoulders.

Tawnya: I like your story because it’s really relatable. You were just able to notice that you couldn’t really pinpoint what it is, but you knew that something was off and it’s just commendable that you fought your way through to find, to discover what the answer would be on the other side of you, feeling more peace and feeling better.

So when you decided to come to the retreat, were you having second thoughts on your way to the retreat or were you all in, or how were you feeling? 

Herman: Oh, that’s, that’s a good question because that, me being in, in the, in the industry of managing risk, that was one of the big questions, coming to Mexico and where are we going?

And what’s happening and I just wanted to make sure that I’m safe and it was a crazy idea for me to bring my wife. But I had thoughts about that. That, okay, I could. I could be responsible for my own risks and decisions, but why the hell did I bring my wife? Kind of popped into my head. I felt kind of responsible for that. But no, everything turned out to be okay. We were greeted by the driver at the specific location and the driver took us to the right place and everything worked out.

Again, while we were driving I had second thoughts and whatnot, but well, when we got to the location, it was like, yeah, great. We’re, we’re all in the clear. 

Tawnya: Wonderful. So then the next day, as you guys were sitting down preparing to ingest your macrodose, were you feeling like you were on the right path?

Did it feel aligned still to what you were looking for? 

Herman: I mean, people talk about set and setting and I cannot emphasize to them enough how important that was in, in my experience. I think the spiritual leader going through her ceremony and all that actually gave me a peace of mind in a way.

And again, I’m saying that as a completely analytical person who just, does not usually inhabit this realm of thought. I deal with numbers all day long. It’s not something that I entertain. But there was something special about that ceremony and maybe the fact that I was ready to face whatever I was supposed to face made that more, more special.

It was a great way, maybe the weather also, I don’t know, but everything kind of was set in the right place for me to take this without any reservations or fear or anything like that. Again, you hear stories about how it makes you feel, what the initial effects are, and all that.

And you know, some people might go through the rough phase or whatnot, but all of those kind of dissolved once I sat down to take the dose because everything else was, I was surrounded by serene positive vibes. I can’t believe I’m saying these things.

 Everything was just, the right combination of everything and the fact that you guys, when before taking the dose, you went through the whole, preparation time saying that this is what’s gonna take place, this is what might, if you, ingest it and you feel like you feel some, queasiness in your stomach. We are prepared for that. 

And the fact that you Tawnya were there, actually gave me a lot of confidence in the fact that we have a nurse on staff that knows what to do. 

Tawnya: Oh, that’s wonderful. So what were your first effects? What did you first notice? 

Herman: Yeah, so we did this exercise, breathing, breathing exercise.

That started the process of getting my limbs tingling. We had to lay down. Start, kind of quote-unquote feeling it. Once I lay down, I felt that my limbs were numb. And I had a little bit of a scare there. I’ll be honest with you. I didn’t know if my limbs were gonna dissolve, or something like that.

And since I was kind of self-conscious about that, I just picked up and went to a station near my room just to like, not freak out anybody else. If I started yelling something, I don’t know. Just, to put everybody’s mind at ease. None, none of that happened is the moment that I started moving.

My mind just got into a different mental state, and by the time I lay down in my station, I was in a completely different world. I started, my eyes started, kind of like, I closed my eyes and I started, my eyes, started doing this REM thing, like I, flickering and whatnot.

And then, the whole thing basically came over me you know. 

Tawnya: So at that point, were you feeling relaxed when you felt the whole thing come over you and were you in for the ride or were you still having some reservations and concerns like you did when you felt your legs dissolving? 

Herman: I was ready, but I wasn’t ready just like to let go a hundred percent. I wanted to make sure that I’m not going crazy or anything like that. So I started basically letting myself into this. And the mushroom doesn’t ask you if you’re ready or not. It just starts, doing its thing. And one of the funniest things, I wouldn’t say funny, but it was a curious thing that happened to me.

I started laughing uncontrollably and I could not stop laughing. It was just an uncontrollable laugh that came over me and I started laughing and I would, my rational side would be like, stop doing that. It’s a retreat people are having, their experiences and you are laughing like a clown.

And yes, I would try to stop myself from laughing and it would just overpower me in a way. At some point, I decided that the resistance was futile and let go. 

Tawnya: When you let go, were you just really releasing into this vibrancy and joy or what would you describe the emotional feeling with all that laughter and playfulness that you were feeling?

Herman: Yeah, so I have to say that there’s three types of changes, the distortions that happened usually they say, and that was the auditory-visual and I guess the emotional part kicked in first. I started laughing and then when I closed my eyes, I started seeing all these beautiful patterns, different kinds of patterns, in front of my eyes.

And beautiful geo geometric, geometric shapes. And then things would get intensified and intensify and all of that was happening while I was laughing, which is the strangest part. And my laughter in a way would, would impede me from actually enjoying whatever I was seeing in a way.

Tawnya: Because it was so powerful?

Herman: It was, it was. And I started after a while I started feeling things not in my head area or whatever, I was thinking that it’s all gonna affect your, your brain, right? It’s all in your brain. But I started feeling strong, sort of pulsation of emotions in my gut. And as you mentioned, there’s a lot of nerve endings there.

That’s why they have gut feelings. ‘Cause we kind of think without a gut. So that’s another area where I started feeling the physical sort of sensation. And the sensation of pulsing energy, pulsing through me. And that was quite powerful. 

So it turned out I had a lot of bottled-up emotions. And I almost forgot about them. I had. I don’t know what the laughter was all about because I wasn’t laughing at anything or, it was just coming. Maybe I was sad for a long time.

I don’t know. I mean that I laughed to equalize my life for the past six years. I don’t know. And, then, you know, I started feeling enormous emotions. I, you know, I really cried. And then I realized that I was crying for my dad who passed away. And then I realized that you know I bottled up that emotion for a long time because, when he passed away, I wasn’t around, I was in school doing my degree, trying to make him proud. 

And my family didn’t tell me about the death and I never went because they were fearful that that would disrupt my studies and I would just start, you know, my grades would deteriorate.

Yeah. So that was basically something that made me very emotional.

Tawnya: So you had that big release. You went from laughter and then to tears and feeling connected to your gut emotionally and energetically. And then what was the next thing that happened? 

Herman: Yeah, after all of that stuff was outta my system. I started feeling an enormous amount of love, as if like, the universe was telling me that, let it all out. And embracing me with a lot of love is, an enormous amount of love that I’ve never felt in my life. It’s strange that I felt an entity talking to me and I kept asking myself whether that entity was myself or was it somebody outside of my consciousness.

And for the lack of the word, I just called it mushroom because I felt there was some sort of an entity downloading information into me in a way. It was a very strange feeling in a way that information would be revealed to me in kind of a one-liner fashion. The ideas would pop into my head as a result of this experience, and I wrote them down actually, because these just wild ideas, like every moment is an infinity.

I mean, I never thought about that, but it just came to me that while I was experiencing this, I was also experiencing infinity. That I’m the universe, and the universe is me in a way. 

Tawnya: Meanwhile you’re saying that this entity came with this embracing quality and you felt an enormous amount of love and support, and then you were simultaneously getting these flashes and insights and being told these deeper truths.

Herman: There was no auditory sort of, distortions or anything of that sort, but I had a telepathic sort of information exchange in ways that I could probably never understand because it was just taking place in my brain. Maybe my neurons are firing in ways that I’ve never experienced before. And in the process, uncovering a more fundamental truth about truths about the universe in a way.

I mean, that’s the. Looking back, I can interpret that.

Tawnya: Do you remember where you were located, when this, the download started to happen like that? Were you still in the grass or were you in a hammock? 

Herman: I was in the grass. Yes. I was in the grass. On the grass. 

Tawnya: You felt that everything was connected. Were you seeing the natural world and was the natural, like set and setting around you also playing a part in how the mushroom entity was communicating with you?

Herman: Yeah. So, it’s an interesting feeling because I’m sort of communicating with this mushroom entity. Gosh, I can’t believe I’m saying these things, but I’m communicating with, with the entity and entity kind of giving me lessons, hence the golden teacher thing, I guess right? 

And then I’m looking around my environment. And by that, by that time I opened my eyes and I was deeply in the experience. I started seeing the world in a slightly distorted way, in the sense that everything had a hexagonal shape that was kind of transparent looking, and it immediately triggered a thought in my mind that the universe is made of these hexagonal sort of little shapes.

 The grass, the sky, the lamp, and all that kind of stuff. I started feeling that I’m connected to everything. And I was like, okay, that makes sense. I’m connected to living things. Maybe there’s, every living thing is connected. And then I got an immediate correction saying that I’m connected to invisible. 

Not invisible but inanimate objects like a chair. At that point, I started laughing and saying WTF. So, it didn’t make sense. I mean, it made sense, but it made sense. But at the same time, I couldn’t explain it. Yeah. So that’s another thing that popped in my head. And it wasn’t that the entity was, the entity was giving me the download, but the information was actually coming from within me. So it was like a catalyst for me to discover that information within me. So that was the experience and by the way, when you are going through these experiences, your rational self is fully aware.

It’s just that you are in a different mental conscious state. Think about it as if you got transported into a different dimension. Think about it as a dimension three and a half, or because you are still there, you’re still in the physical world. You just put the augmented reality goggles kind of situation going on there where you overlay some sort of deeper.

I don’t know. You put on glasses that show you the world in a different way, in a different light. And even though you are talking to people who exist in the realm of 3D and the realm of consciousness as we experience it, normally you feel that there is a sort of, a, kind of a membrane between you guys is you, you’re talking to them, the information gets exchanged between you and them.

But somehow you feel that they’re not quite in your dimension. That was kind of interesting for me to experience. 

Tawnya: You’re speaking about communicating with the other guests at the retreat or other human beings, like you were really aware about how they couldn’t feel your full experience?

Herman: Yes. I was talking to the people who were attending to us. And, I was half expecting them to not be real, to be honest, because you are, you are in this state of mind where you think that’s another thing that you get a feeling that everything is a construct of a consciousness.

Like a chair is a construct. I am a construct. A bottle that’s sitting on my desk is a construct. All of this is a thought. That came to existence because the universal consciousness, which you are part of, has created it. It has deep implications. It has had this deep implications on, on my psyche, and also the fact that I am connected to a chair or an inanimate object kind of made sense.

And when I was like, oh, I guess, the mushroom entities telling me that we are kind of meat of the, of the same atoms to which I got immediate feedback saying that, nope, actually you’re spiritually connected. So I don’t quite know how to, what to make out of it to be honest.

Because it’s such a bizarre concept. Teaches you that all these things and you, which you differentiate yourself from inanimate objects because you are, you have life, you have consciousness. Right? But in that setting, you are all the same spiritually. 

Tawnya: Wow. And it’s beautiful because you feel immense connectivity.

And they say that those who have a full mystical experience will have the best effects long-lasting. And one of the definitions of a full mystical experience is that immense feeling of interconnectedness. You definitely had quite an experience. And you mentioned that it had tremendous implications on how you’re feeling and how you’re living your life now.

Are you ready to go there or did you have more to say about the experience and this conversation between you and the mushroom?

Herman: No, I guess the final thought that I just wanted to tell and relay is that yeah, it’s just everything. Love is the fundamental element of the universal consciousness, is the thought that popped into my head at some point.

That everything is kind of like permeated with love. There’s no, nothing that can escape it in a way that’s, that’s basically the final, final thought. 

Tawnya: Okay. So as the day ended were you able to relate to your wife? Was she able to, were you guys able to integrate together in the evening or were you guys so blown away by your unique experiences that you didn’t really do much of that till the following day?

Herman: No, I approached her. I gave her enough time to just experience her own thing and she was sitting in one place. And we actually experienced things a little bit differently ’cause, I started going to places trying to explore the world around me. My senses became so acute that I could see how the water evaporated off the table and I could see things so clearly in HD.

I started asking myself, look, if I can see that, well, why don’t I see it all the time like this? She experienced things a little bit differently. I don’t know if there was anybody in that group that experienced the same things that I did, but I did make a point of asking about the common threads from Jessica.

Say, she’s seen so many different people come in and go. And then I started watching more videos of people who have done it. My experience is not unique. The ideas are not unique. And it started an interesting thought process in my mind. That if we are all individuals, and if this is just a hallucination, shouldn’t the experiences also be so diverse?

Why is there a common thread in all of these, not all of them, but the ones that experience deep spiritual shifts in their consciousness? Why is there a common thread? I’ve seen people talk about love and that everything is connected. At least those two concepts just repeat themselves.

Tawnya: You’re right, you’re right. So you’re speaking of love and that everything is connected as the common thread. Okay. 

Herman: Yeah. People may not have been as eloquent to describe what they feel, but everything is connected. ‘Everything is love’ is easier to interpret and verbalize. But I think, they may have had the same download of exposure to information, but just cannot probably pinpoint or verbalize it.

Tawnya: That is really interesting. And so how were you doing for the rest of the retreat? Did you like the other experiences? Did they differ? Did they complete your spiritual understanding that you had during the macro dose? 

Herman: Yeah. Macrodose shifted my consciousness in ways that I couldn’t imagine, and as I was coming off of it, by the way, in the beginning I thought, I’m not doing DMT.

It looks trippy and really iffy. Now why would I do DMT? And I didn’t know much about DMT. But when I went there, I decided I’m gonna try it because if I don’t do it, I won’t do it ever again. Anyway, I went into this experience knowing, thinking that what could top the experience of mushroom, I’ve just had the most profound sort I’ve experienced in my life.

 And in many ways, it’s still the best and the most significant thing that I have done to myself from a point of view of changing my life. But DMT has done something that I’ve never thought was possible because when, remember I said, that when you, when you take the mushroom, you have an AR augmented reality goggles, you know, you are in the same reality, but you just feel it a little bit differently, you know, and there’s something going on in your mind.

And the DMT experience just dissolved me completely, in the sense that I could not feel if I was a person or a thought. It just, when I took, when I, when I smoked the DMT, I was just transported into a completely new dimension. And then that’s basically what you would get when you do the virtual reality headset.

 Like when you put on a virtual reality you are kinda in a completely different world, dimension, you name it. And that’s what DMT did. ‘Cause I saw an amazing array of colors and the same entity kind of smiling at me in a way while I was just at awe with whatever I was seeing. I thought I forgot how to breathe because I didn’t exist.

But, but obviously I was breathing, everything was okay and when, when they asked me to open up my eyes, I did. And everything looked like a cartoon. Everybody looked like a cartoon, which was a really bizarre experience, but at the same time, very, very, unique. 

Tawnya: Now, when you were in the experience, you saw another entity smiling at you, or this almost higher consciousness. Can you describe that? 

Herman: Yeah. So when you’re in A DMT, everything is kind of like a DalĂ­-esque, where I would say, impressionist kind of like everything has these triangular, there’s a lot of triangles I saw, but the face I could make because it was just on the right corner of my eyes, if I could call them eyes because I was nothing.

I don’t know. And I felt the same sort of presence that I felt with mushrooms in a way, smiling at me and the opposite side of me all, all the time. As if showing me something. 

Tawnya: It’s really amazing and unique. When you think about it now and you talk about it now, do you still wonder about being so closely connected to that higher consciousness entity experience?

Or what are your thoughts about it now being back home? Because I know you say it’s kind of awkward for you to say I was having a psychic conversation with this entity, but it was at the same time one of the most profound experiences of your life. 

Herman: The memory of the experience kind of feeds off after a while. I’m back into the normal sort of state and still feel it. I feel the immense power of what I’ve gone through. My consciousness has shifted. My habits are slowly shifting and there’s no way I could go back to the same old version of me. But at the same time, I feel that it’s, it wasn’t like a complete there’s, there’s more to that than, than what I have experienced.

And I’m kind of looking forward to the second session and whatnot, at some point. 

Tawnya: Yeah. That’s amazing. So you are planning on integrating it more into your life and I know that you had said that you noticed beforehand that there was something off, but you couldn’t put your finger on it.

How are your feelings in regards to your connection to peace and inner peace at this point? 

Herman: Oh, yes, at the end of the session once I got everything out of my system, emotionally, I guess I felt an enormous peace with myself. And the thought, the one liner that came to my mind was that, I’m aligned with the universe now.

Like you went to the chiropractor and they just did their magic and now you’re like all nice and loose and whatnot and everything is kind of aligned. But emotionally in a way. So emotional chiropractor, I don’t know if that’s a thing. 

Tawnya: No, I think it’s a wonderful analogy.

Herman: Yeah, it has lifted a lot of subconscious sort of burden that I had in my mind that I never knew actually existed. Which brings me back to that comment of a person who said that they had thousands of years of therapy in one session. It truly is that if nothing else.

Tawnya: Amazing. So you’re looking forward to letting all the dust settle, and like did your wife feel the same or how are you guys doing since you did the journey together? 

Herman: Oh, she’s, she’s done better. She’s had problems at work that impeded her development and we talked about it. I would say, I, this is how I would approach it. And she would say, no, you don’t understand this gives me anxiety blah, blah, blah. And she just needed a reset because, it’s a new setting, new people, but the old neural pathways are basically making you think that it’s the same situation happening over and over again. 

So I can’t speak for her, but she’s so happy now and she’s so calm and composed and doing her job and she’s very productive. So she does work, periodically from home. So in the past she would just, her mind would wander and she would just do anything but work.

But these days she’s very focused on work and doing things and getting things done, and feeling great about herself. 

Tawnya: Oh, that’s amazing. And what about you, like the self-esteem point, do you feel a change in your self-esteem? 

Herman: Oh, yes, absolutely. I mean, I’m more confident. I’m more in line with who I am.

I don’t have any problems with the way that I see it. 

Tawnya: That’s great. That’s amazing. Well, I’m Herman. I’m just so happy that you came on and went into detail about your experience. It’s wonderful to hear as a science-based person, it’s someone who really wasn’t, thinking that you would say these terms.

It’s wonderful to have you on here explaining what it felt like to have this amazing experience. And I also loved how you talked about how intrigued you were by the common thread that you saw as everything being connected and everything being connected by love. And that’s an interesting curiosity that you would experience that profoundly and then start wanting to know more about. That’s really interesting. There’s something to that and I wonder why.

Did you enjoy communicating with the guests at the retreat about your experience and did you leave feeling more fulfilled, having known that others had gone through a different experience than if you had just seen a practitioner and had your own experience on your own?

Were you, did you feel it was more enriching to be with the group? 

Herman: Oh, absolutely. I think it’s, it’s always good to have other data points and I try to be as, as minimally intrusive as possible ’cause people are going through their own things, but was kind enough to describe their situation and what they felt in some ways kind of reaffirmed me about the importance of what I’ve experienced and how it all kind of fits together with my understanding. 

I actually think that there is something to this in a sense that, consciousness if you think about it from a metaphysical or physical dimension, experienced an altered state of reality and it got me thinking about what is reality and how, how do we exist in it. We’re getting a little bit deep into the question and the realm of like, why do we exist kind of situation. But it’s so fascinating. It’s so fascinating that there may be an objective reality that we inhabited during that session that could be explored, you know, using mathematics or physics and whatnot. 

Tawnya: Yeah. And I remember you being really excited and having this renewed inner fire and passion for discovering more about consciousness because your experience was such a profound one.

And do you still feel like you have that renewed interest in learning more about consciousness and physics?

Herman: Absolutely. I am a big sort of fan of quantum mechanics and sort of meshes really well with the concepts of consciousness, or the act of observing something changes the physical reality on a subatomic level.

What if, the types of insights that we gained were so fundamental? That they would change our view of physics and the view of the world as we know it. And we, by the way, one of the things, it’s very fundamental. One of the things that I got away from this is that we kind of are eternal.

There’s no like death kind of thing, ’cause whatever we think about ourselves, we are part of this general consciousness and we are completely eternal. And the fact that we have taken this form of a person is, I don’t know if it’s like a chance or this is the way things are, but if you think that everything is a construct of consciousness, then you are also a construct of consciousness.

And that consciousness is you. But it also is the chair. But there’s a lot of things that I need to kind of unpack. And in order to do those things, I think I need to experience more of these things to actually get to the granular details of these, of these revelations that I had.

And I’m talking to you as a completely rational person where I’ve never been like drawn into mystical experiences or anything like that. I think there’s something there to a degree that I am seriously thinking about going and combining these altered states of consciousness with the methods of analysis in physics to actually maybe discover something new.

I mean, it’s still an idea in the back of my mind. Maybe I will find out something and it wouldn’t make sense at all. But the fact that there are common threads, everybody’s feeling it the same way. Not everybody, but those who have profound experiences that can verbalize it have the same common, common threads.

Is, kind of, giving me ideas about the fact that there are things that we experience that are real and not the figment of our imagination. 

Tawnya: Yeah. That’s really, really beautiful. And I mean, you talk about each individual human being actually not an individual human. So there’s this possibility of not having to take ourselves so seriously because we’re a part of something so much greater.

But yet at the same time, we’re also a chair. So there’s this amazing potential. Yet humility and that grand idea of connection and that we’re supported and your story’s beautiful because of this higher consciousness was a catalyst for you to discover these insights within yourself. So there’s like so much to be unpacked there about what we can even find within ourselves. So I’m excited that you’re excited about legitimate ways to explore and discover and see if we can change our understanding as a species of how we see the world.

But I’m also excited to hear how much you’ve had on a personal level about how you saw yourself and how connected you were to accessing so much more. 

Herman: Absolutely. I mean, ego is one of the things that actually impedes our growth, and I kind of knew that on a subconscious level.

But this experience kind of solidified the whole thing that there’s not a whole lot of difference between me and the world. And I don’t exist outside of this world in a way. 

Tawnya: The last question that I wanted to ask you is that you say, I can’t believe I’m saying these things. Have you told any of your friends about your experience? And are they surprised to hear it or are people really listening to you?

Herman: I honestly haven’t, I haven’t yet divulged the information to any close friends. I did tell my family I think I have a brother who has struggled through like life in general, kind of being lost. And I honestly want him to come and experience this thing in your, in your resort at some point.

And other than that, I haven’t told anybody else. I think, probably people feel it when I talk to them and you may, they might feel it that I have changed. But yeah, publicly this is going to be the first time I would, I would, divulge this information to the world.

Tawnya: Oh, well thank you so much. I feel so honored. Thank you so much for going into detail about your amazing experience, and I just wish you the best of luck. 

Herman: Thank you so much. It was an honor to experience this and thank you so much for being so attentive and I love the team. It was, it was great.

Tawnya: Oh, thank you so much, Herman.

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